How to stop dating losers
, expert relationship counselor Gregg Michaelsen describes three families of the Wrong clan – Users, Losers and Snoozers – and contrasts them with Mr.Right, a man you can link up with, if you are at your best. Right, initially giving you respect, attention, consideration, perhaps even charming your friends and family.
Your first few dates on the town are followed by excuses to stay in, at your home or his.
He sizes you up with questions that seem attentive but are calculated to find your vulnerabilities. You’ll be asked for favors, but get little in return.
Soon, you’ll find he is not interested in what interests you. Eventually, Michaelsen writes, “He doesn’t listen, doesn’t make plans, and can’t remember your birthday. Slow down the progression of the relationship, and try to observe him objectively. Don’t blame him; you’ll only waste your time, as he expertly plays the Victim. According to the author, two more types hold promise: the Snoozer and Mr. A Snoozer can be transformed and trained to become a Mr. Basically good, Snoozers need care and feeding, judicious use of carrot and stick, and you must present some challenge and mystery.
He is a narcissist.” The world, including your world, is to revolve around him. Wait a month or longer before you decide he is worth continuing to date. As a lover, he’ll be unexciting, unless stimulated by porn. Michaelsen writes that the snoozers are inconsistent. He still publishes and helps others write and publish their books, via Your Book With
There were forces working against us and I didn’t want to make things worse by being unaccommodating.